Untitled

Everyday, I met random people in different situations.
I love talking to elders, because I can get some ideas and knowledge that can help me grow as an individual.

Most of the time, i am asking for their love lifes.
One old woman looks very young in her 60's and yes she is a Spanish. She is living alone in her house and I asked where is her husband. She said he died few years ago.
But you know what, she looks young and always smiling. She looks happy.

I ask what is her secret knowing that when someone you love passed away hurts really bad. She answered briefly,

Acceptance.

There are things that we cannot change, she said. Life is short to make everything complicated.

...

Another old woman I know is divorced.
Almost same age with the first old woman. But she looks strict and likes criticism that much. Sometimes she is pissing me off. But she is also nice.
I met her ex-husband one time and he is very funny person. Opposite of what his ex-wife has.
I guess she is not happy. I guess there is a lot of things happened before. I guess she never accepted life. Or i don't know. There are people who can handle problmes and struggles very well and there are people who can not.

Life is unfair? Maybe. Maybe not. We are all human beings. We are not perfect. We just need to choose how to deal with everything.

The key is in our hand.

-Vhey Razon
July 24, 2016
Arturo Soria, Madrid, Spain

When we wish...

Sabi nga, nasa Dios ang awa at nasa tao ang gawa.

It is true. Minsan hiling tayo ng hiling:
"LORD ibigay mo sakin ang taong para sakin."
"LORD gusto ko 'nun. Ibigay mo sakin yun."
"LORD willing ako maghintay, pero gusto ko talaga magawa yun."

Let's analyze. Minsan sa kaiintay natin natatapos na ang oras at wala pa rin nangyayari. Hindi porke ginawa mong humiling, maghihintay ka na lang. We also need to move. Kumilos. He will provide the woods and you have to build the home. He will give you water but you have to find your own glass.
Parang ganun. Bueno, kanya kanya naman tayo ng opinyon when it comes to things like this, lalo na at kanya-kanya naman talaga tayo ng paniniwala. But the bottomline is you always have to move. Gusto mo ng lovelife, maghanap ka. It depends on your priorities anyway if you feel you need it lang naman. Some people do not need lovelife for now. Some people do. It depends nga.

Kung nakita mo na finally ang bagay o tao na gusto mo at magpapasaya sayo, you have to do something about it. Risk. What's for you will eventually be for you. And if it is not, it is going to be a good experience or a lesson. Still, you're not going to be left empty. Minsan kasi aalis sa atin ang isang tao at akala natin walang wala na tayo, PERO, look beyond that o kung hindi mo makita beyond, look at your back. What do you have there? Appreciate everything that is going on. Minsan hiniling mo, binigay sayo at nawala, hindi pa dun natatapos ang lahat. Believe HIM.

If we are going to be afraid to get hurt, lost, cry over someone or something, to be left behind, then ano ang mga bagay na hindi mo kinatatakutan?
:)

Trust and Faith

Minsan dadating tayo sa point na hindi na natin kayang magtiwala. As in pati sarili nating desisyon sa buhay, hindi na natin mapanindigan.
Madalas kaya tayo palaging beast mode. Madalas kaya tayo palaging nakakasakit or nasasaktan.
Madalas kaya tayo nagiging undecided o naguguluhan.

"May tiwala pa ba tayo sa tao? May tiwala pa ba tayo sa ating mga sarili?"

Hirap ano? Hirap nating hanapin ang landas natin lalo kapag walang wala na tayong makita. Puro failures at disappointments na lang ang nangunguna.

Kaya tayo madaling ma-fall eh. Kapag sa ating mga madidilim na araw eh may nagpakita saatin na maliwanag naman pala ang buhay. Blessing ito kahit hindi pa naman natin sure kung ano ang kahihinatnan. Wala lang. Basta naniniwala lang tayong blessing 'yun. Dahil hiniling natin 'yun kay Papa Jesus at dumating naman. Naniniwala tayo sa Kanya eh.

Kaya aalagaan natin ang lahat lahat at gagawin natin ang best natin. Kasi we believe na galing 'to sa Panginoon. That person is from Jesus. Normally, wala naman talagang taong dadaan sa buhay natin na wala lang. Or depende din talaga, masyado kasi akong palaisip kaya ko naiisip 'to. But in case you have no idea and you always want to play safe as always, sana maisip mo na.

"Everything happens for a reason. If the lesson is not for you, maybe it is for them."

Oo. Minsan kasi ginagamit din tayong instrument ng Panginoon to help someone. Pero di ka nya gagamitin king alam nyang di mo kaya. Galing nya ano? Paano mo napapagbago ang buhay ng isang gago, este tao. Hehe.
Wag ka munang mamangha. Antayin mo pa ang next move ni Papa God. Tiwala ka lang talaga sa kanya. 💙

Why I'd rather write.

Expressing (emotions) is never easy. It never was. It will took you madaming hugot of lakas ng loob just to type and post your thoughts.
(Pero it depends na rin. You know, minsan may mga posts na hindi muna iniisip bago ilabas, and I will not talk about that. Hehe.)
Syempre bago mo ishare, mapapaisip ka muna kung madami bang matutuwa sa posts mo or what. But believe me, if your posts or blog is really from your heart, hindi ka magdadalawang isip i-share.

Kasi it is your happiness. You are talking about YOU. And happiness is real when shared sabi nga sa isang qoutation. Hindi naman mababawasan ang kaligayahan mo kapag sinabi mo sa iba. Minsan nga hindi mo alam, nakaka-inspire ka na pala ng iba. Minsan hindi mo alam madami na palang naga-abang sa mga kwento mo.

Hindi naman porke nag-share ka eh wala ka ng privacy. You know you are inteligent enough to choose what to post. Wala pa yan sa 1/8 ng nalalaman nila sa kabuoan ng buhay mo. You only do it because you're happy doing it. And you want to be remembered. You want to inspire.(Kunyare sarili ko na lang ang ang kinakausap ko. Hehe)

Ako talaga ang tipo ng tao na ayoko masyadong ipakita ang sarili ko at ang mga naiisip ko sa iba, mas gusto ko pang isulat. I do not easily listen sa opinyon ng iba because I know what I am doing. But, there are times na I need to talk too. May social life din naman ako at madaming kaibigan. Minsan kasi drained ka na at ayaw mo na rin kausapin ang sarili mo.
I also realized, when you have personal problems, sarilinin mo na lang.
I know your friends are always willing to help you naman. They are always there but sometimes, minsan, ikaw at ikaw lang din naman ang makakatulong sa sarili mo. I mean, hindi pala sometimes, most of the time pa nga eh.
Or kung hindi mo na talaga kaya, we always have one friend that understands us. Wag mo na ipaalam pa sa iba.

You should lift yourself up and wag kang magpahila sa baba. Ang opinyon mo eh mahalin mo at wag kang makikinig sa iba. Good or bad, atleast sayo yan. Atleast wala kang sisisihin.

Masaya. Masaya ang mabuhay sa sariling mundo. Masaya ang wala kang kinaiilangan, at wala kang pakialam sa sasabihin ng iba. Masarap magpakatotoo.

Mas gusto ko pa talagang isulat na lang ang mga nararamdaman ko kesa mag share sa tao ng as in personal talks. Dito wala kang judgment, dito walang bad vibes, dito malaya ka. Magro-grow ka naman din kahit di mo iexplain ang sarili mo sa iba.

Love yourself first, tapos saka na sila.

💙

Not the same feeling anymore 💜

In the first 5 months of our amazing relationship, I can't deny that I became super inspired and feeling loved everyday of my life.

The 6th month is the happiest, because finally we can hug and kiss each other unlimited! Oh how I wish I can do it again right now!

I have been waiting for this feeling to come again and having Faith to God Almighty, here I am. Blogging how HAPPY I am. (THANKS GOD NAOVERCOME KO. HAHA!)

I know we are going to fight and argue over things. I LOVE how we argue. That kind of "sagutan" without bad words, sagutan with sense, sagutan with feelings, that is what I like. True. He always amazes me. I know he loves me a lot that's why he's like this to me.
💜

In 2months mahigit na he is in Pinas he never failed to check me up, update me on what he is doing, (except those days na naiyamot na ako sakanya at ako na ang hindi nagparamdam dahil I can feel he is testing how much I love him and so I did, tinest ko din sya kung hanggang saan ang patience nya sa akin.), maximum times of video call and call is 3x a month 15mins or less. All chats. Pero walang palya, kahit na magkaaway kami araw araw may message. 10 pogi points.
Imagine how can you trust a person thru chats lang. Haha. But I did. I do trust him. Ayokong pahirapan ang sarili ko and sya. I know the KEY is in ME. 💜

WE BOTH made a mistake, nagkamali sya, nagkamali ako. In the end, walang natalo, patas ang laban. Niloko nya ako? Hindi, kasi hindi ako nagpaloko. Magkaiba 'yon.
Ang nagpaloko eh when you did not do anything about it. Yung hinayaan mo na lang.

So anyway, hindi ko na sya mahal. Mahal na mahal na mahal ko na sya, like he is a platelet sa aking blood na as in dumadaloy sa aking ugat.

He always do his best na patunayan saakin how much he love me. He even insisted on having shared account in Facebook. 💜 Ang haba haba ng hair ko.

I fell in love with his mind. With him. I respect him being a Man. I do not want to remove his manhood just because of my ego. He knows what he is doing and he needs me to support him.

If you're his friend and you are reading this, there is more about him I know.

Magaan ang pakiramdam ko kasi pagkagising ko kanina, parang may masamang espiritu na umalis sa katawan ko. Haha! And then I can finally say,

"Eto na ang hinihintay ko. I'm back on track!"

So I want to THANK GOD sa lahat ng ito.

Girls, if you want to feel the same way i feel? Appreciate and do not count what you do. Lagi akong ganito kay Kerk na goodvibes. Alam nyo yun,  pero siguro yung mindset ko na I hate Pinas because I am not there, that is killing me. And that almost kill me. And never will I want to feel that again. Parang kagabi lang, I am about to cry dahil nahohomesick ako and all. Pero bago ako matulog, naiiyak ako kasi di ko alam na kaya ko palang magmahal ng taong kagaya nya.

He's my ONE. And if he is not, I'll make a way.